Wednesday, December 12, 2018

Stitching Has Recommenced

I am immensely grateful for all the good wishes I have received- you don't know how much it means and how it adds to my day!  A friend from Canberra, Libby Williams sent this delightful lady angel/woman she made, when I was first in hospital with the hysterectomy and whilst i awaited biopsy results. She has been with me the entire time and is a daily reminder of friendship and good wishes, so thank you Libby she greets me every day!


The neuropraxia in my right leg has continued to improve to such an extent that I am almost game to try and walk unaided- however after having a few falls  ( not recent) your confidence  gets a bit of a shaking up and I still go out with my crutch.

My broken left wrist was reset with a metal plate and it has been quite debilitating and of course I can't drive and am reliant on other people to take me places, as until now public transport has also been out of the question. I naturally do a lot of things with my left hand, though I am not left handed, it really put an end to stitching on my wellness blanket, though I did do some stitching with a frame. My wellness blanket records  the days since my diagnosis with cervical cancer and some of the intervening incidents and I will continue it until radiotherapy has finished and I meet with the gyno-oncology unit at the Women's Hospital at the end of the radiotherapy. The words record the thought for each day ; they are sometimes filled with fear and trepidation and others with hope and even joy and a reminders to keep creative. I have tried to use my own words rather than other people's inspiring quotes, and I have been doing  quite a lot of stitching this last week to catch up the days I missed because the wrist was too immobile to do anything. I should be caught up before Christmas I hope! But it is a funny thing, you simply can't catch it up all in one go, because well the mood of the day really  does play a role in outcome.

The blanket has been a way of focusing thoughts , even the dark ones, committing them to a mark, giving it a place, but not allowing it to overwhelm. I am surprised how well it has worked and  it has given me space to focus on being as positive as I can be, and has even somehow given me a bit of a creativity roadmap. The background in the photo will be changed- I have not quite decided which colour but there is still  4 weeks of radiotherapy left ( they only take off Christmas day) so it will continue to grow as well as catch up the missing days.



Another practice that I commenced at the beginning of the year which has also been quite helpful  for my present experience and is almost a meditative process is rewriting poetry. I rewrite the words of a poet by hand every morning: it's the first thing I do. It started out  as a sort of Book of Hours kind of thing  and getting to know some poetry better, but I have enjoyed the process of simply writing another's words and also feeling, by writing my way through, poetry I might not otherwise have read. So thus far I have worked through Rainer Maria Rilke ( Book of Hours), Wislawa Szymborska ( collected poems) and some poems from Halina Poswiatowska ( an unknown Polish poet to me but found through a poem dedication in Szymborska- and am now awaiting a book by her,  though unfortunately most of her work is in Polish- her work is  heart rending and poignant) and at present, Judith Herzberg ( a country compatriot). Its been a way  to take myself out of myself, and have the thoughts of another start the day.

And last but not least I have sold my shed and block. Now starts the search for elsewhere to live and find a home. My budget is limited, but  you can build a garden and  home anywhere really- just look at cities. It will definitely be in a country area ( i have missed the "bush" these last 8 weeks) My intention is to make it an "art" home filled with things that  inspire me, and warm my soul, and where I can work! My heart would love France, but the reality is that the legal stuff becomes a bit complicated- and i want things to stay simple and not get weighed down by legalities and residence issues.

Meanwhile onward.......

10 comments:

Jane Rollason said...

Great news about the shed, sorry you can't face all the mountains of paperwork for France , but you can visit us here anytime xx
Good to see from your writings that you continue to improve and the radio won't be too long to go . I am up to my armpits in mess with the new place , you will have that pleasure to come Have a lovely Christmas with the girls and a very healthy new year Jane and Michel ( sends a hug)

Unknown said...

So glad to see that you are beginning to get back to some sort of normality. Creativity always helps. If you have to come thru Sydney I have plenty of spare beds. All the best Sandra

Robbie said...

Good thoughts and prayers for you! 2019 will be a great year for you!!!!!

Anonymous said...

May I please copy this idea? I know you don't have it copyrighted, probably, but I feel obliged to tell you that I'm going to sort of copy it. Many good wishes for a continued recovery. I've very glad your property has been sold - it was both a burden and a joy, that was clear. Now you have choices.

Penny said...

So glad to hear from you. Pleased for you that the property sold.I am sure you will find somewhere, even if not in France. We are still not financially secure. What it takes to get a pension. We are running out of money but we have a garden of sorts.Age is our problem.

meghs said...

So very pleased to hear how things are going, Dijanne. The other day I found an old notebook filled with poems I loved (and still love). I had started copying these out during a bad period some years ago; it was not long before it became a pleasure and a healing in itself and finding new poems was a delight. You are right that the hand writing is part of that! All the best with finding somewhere to live.

Jenny said...

So pleased you have sold your property now to find a new home for you .
Best wishes for your health.
Jenny

cristina said...

Hope you’ll have a peaceful Christmastime and a very better new year. Sending you all my affection and hoping to see you soon in Europe ❤️

Olga Norris said...

So great to read of your positive outlook, and your positive progress on so many fronts. Good luck with it all, and with finding an art-inspiring and art-making haven.

Andy Lloyd Williams said...

Dijanne - you are an example to us all showing your resilience and positive thinking. I wish you all the best for a good New Year - peace and good health
My travellers blanket is coming on well, I really LOVE stitching it. After the Christmas rush will send you some more photos, although I am not very good with Facebook!. Very best wishes
Andy Lloyd Williams, Bath UK